The post I never wrote

I can't believe I haven't written a blog since Adam's birthday.  I have been wanting to, many times.  And it's not because I don't miss Adam or that I have forgotten about him.  I just haven't been in the place to share what I am feeling because it is the same feelings over and over again.  I miss Adam.  I wish he was here with me.  I dream about the day I get to see him again in Heaven. 

Anyway, I still am not in the place to write down any feelings, but I wanted to share some pictures from Adam's Birthday and from the anniversary of the day that he got to meet Jesus. 




Instead of making a Birthday cake, I made Adam yummy Birthday cupcakes. 



Adam's Birthday decorations and gifts. 

The "A" cupcake.  Allison insisted it was Adam's but didn't like that he wasn't here to eat it.  And his 3 sparklers; 2 stars and a 1.

The sparklers lighting up as we sang "Happy Birthday".

The balloon to Adam from Steve

Another balloon....

Allison drew a picture of Adam on her balloon.

And she wrote his name

My balloon to Adam.

Proud big sister with her balloon.

Steve waiting for the time to "send them to Adam".



Me, holding on to the balloons tight and not wanting to le them go because it felt like I was letting go of Adam again. 



The 1st one was off....

Steve's were not far behind.

There they go!

We stood there and watched them until we couldn't see them anymore.

Now I am preparing to spend another Christmas without Adam.  Last year, I bought him an ornament for our tree and said that it would just be a one time thing.  Ha!  I can't leave him out.  I bought him another ornament, picked out another picture of him to go in the frame and it is in the front of the tree right next to his big sister's!